Potty training 101

I did a little reminiscing today and looked back at our potty training journey. I thought I could share a little "wisdom" - if you can call it that - with anyone who's on this hellacious path with me.

Just for fun I have a couple posts that I'm linking to: our last pull-up, April 8, 2008, Alison's first poop, my mom's attempt at potty training, the damage triplets can do to a bathroom, November's potty training attempt, wee wee woes, and when I decided to potty train them after their 2nd birthday.

• 3-1/2 was an AWESOME age to potty train. I just read a post written back in January of 2007 (the girls were 2) and I quit potty training after two hours. Yes, it was that bad. I'm not saying don't do anything until 3-1/2. Up until this point I've been letting the girls go on the potty anytime they want or I would set them on the potty whenever I had the energy. I think that has definitely sped the process up. Every time before this that I tried to train them, it ended in frustration. Even though it's much easier now, it's still incredibly hard! This is the hardest thing I've ever done in my life, no lie, because there's no definite end.
• Keep track of what's happening. Two days ago, I started writing down who was dry in the morning, what times the girls pee/poop, and any accidents. That's when I realized Alison has been day and night trained... since July 13! This whole time I didn't have a clue. That gives me hope. And yesterday the girls went all day without any accidents - all things a chart had to tell me since my brain is fried.
• Get rid of the pull-ups. We ran out of pull-ups on July 2 and haven't bought any since. I bought a bunch of puffy underwear that are amazing! I let the girls sleep in them at night, too. This means a lot of bed-wetting from Kristin, but I do it for three big reasons and one little one. 1) I think she'll figure it out faster. 2) I won't be tempted to put her back in pull-ups (good thing, too, because until yesterday, she was the most defiant one). 3) It motivates me to tweak our liquids and get my butt out of bed in the morning to get them to the toilet. 4) Finally, my small reason, it saves us money! It's really no different than cloth diapers.
• Don't be afraid to punish. If they understand where the toilets are and how to use them on a regular basis, I think it's appropriate for some children to be scolded if they pee two minutes after they sat on the potty. Mind you, I don't yell at Kristin unless she's whining on the toilet because she's already horrified when I take her, and I only scold if they are being sassy about using the potty. We save this one for "special occasions," hahahahaha!!! (evil grin)
• Take away underpants. Kristin loves her underpants, but she has had a lot of accidents in them. So to prove a point, I take them away after she has an accident and she can only "earn" them back the next time she uses the toilet. It works wonders!!!
• Treats... many kinds. Would you believe it if I told you a different candy might work for different children? I was handing out M&Ms or jelly beans for all potty successes. Still, Kristin couldn't have cared less. THEN I brought out the Swedish fish. Now Kristin begs to go potty so she can have a "gummy fish." What a huge difference! And the girls love rainbow stickers when they go poop. I make a huge deal out of it and repeat over and over why one girl gets the sticker. They all clap and cheer (it's pretty ridiculous, I know) and beg for their own rainbow sticker. I gave the girls a pack of Smarties candies yesterday because all three were dry all day. This morning, they woke up asking for "special candy." Apparently this stuff sticks with them.
• Let them watch themselves go. Okay, this is weird, but it worked for Emma and Kristin. If they wouldn't go on the potty, I'd tell them to watch as they went pee and I'd point into the toilet. They'd crane their necks and sure enough! They'd go.
• Get rid of the potty seat. The girls LOVE using the regular "big" toilet. They hover their little butts. They can't fidget as much because they will fall in (that happened to two of them) which means they'll be more likely to get the business done and get out. Plus it drops their butt lower which I think helps them poop. I call it "squatting angle."
• If they poop in their pants, make sure they can feel it in there when you tell them it's naughty or whatever it is you tell them. That means squish that puppy in their butt crack. Also disgusting, but it upset Emma enough to get her happily pooping in the toilet. I think sometimes they don't mind the poop in their pants, so I made them mind.
• Let them call someone to celebrate. This was a tip from someone else, and it works (sometimes). We call grandma a LOT.
• Watch for warning signs. Until I started potty training the girls this last time, I didn't realize that Emma grabs her butt when she has to poop and she crosses her legs when she has to pee. Kristin and Emma both run off and hide. I caught Emma just in time to have her poop on the potty for the first time (that I can remember, anyway).
• Our schedule runs about one potty trip every hour-and-a-half to two hours. I know if I go much longer than that, I'm asking for trouble.
• Be fluid. If you have a rigid schedule or set of treats or way of doing things, you might not find that something else works better.
• Make it fun. The first weekend of our potty training escapade, we went to Wisconsin. The girls got to use a port-a-potty. They loved it! They called it the "potty house." When I painted their room, I hung a pink mesh princess bed tent over the girls' toilet. We renamed it their "pink bathroom."
• Don't be afraid to quit. Finally, if it's not working at all after a few days, take a break. That was the best thing I did for myself. It was so stressful the last five hundred times we tried to potty train!!! We would go all out for a few days and had little success. One girl would "get it" for half a day and then would poop and pee in her pants for the next three days. We'd take a step back and I'd let the girls use the potties at their leisure. I can't believe the huge difference age makes. I never thought so before, but there might not be any way to force them if they're not ready. Because I'd been forcing with no such luck.

So those are my keys to success. Simple and straightforward. I guess they'll be using toilets before they hit the nursing home after all!